Formal Dinners in Private Homes
This is part of a series I've been wanting to do for a long time so I am
excited I am able to have Eugene do this for my blog. It is about
etiquette as was appropriate in the Victorian Era (1837–1901). During
that time, culturally there was a transition away from the rationalism
of the Georgian period and toward romanticism and mysticism with regard to religion, social values, and the arts. The era is popularly associated with the values of social restraint. What? Social restraint? What's that?!? So we move on....thank you for reading.
Love, George
Formal Dinners in Private Homes
There are certain requisites for a formal dinner, whether a great one for two hundred people or a small one for eight. To make an enjoyable formal dinner the following requisites should be followed:
If cocktails are to be served at the party they should be mixed and prepared by the butler before the guests arrive, so that the dinner is not delayed. The butler, footman, and waitress may not leave until the guests have been ushered out, the glass washed, and the last ash tray emptied. Some caterers send a bill for the services and prefer you don't add tip. Payment methods vary in different localities and depend on the policy of the agency through which they have been hired. In any case, the method and the amount of payment should be established at the time they are hired to avoid embarrassment or unpleasantness that may ruin an otherwise perfect evening.
Love, George
Formal Dinners in Private Homes
There are certain requisites for a formal dinner, whether a great one for two hundred people or a small one for eight. To make an enjoyable formal dinner the following requisites should be followed:
- Guests who are congenial to one another (by far the most important requirement)
- Food that is good of its kind, and a suitable menu perfectly prepared and served
- Table Furnishings in perfect condition and suitable to the occasion and the surroundings, freshly laundered linen, brilliantly polished silver (no matter how little of it), shining glassware.
- Service that is competent and expertly suited to your requirements
- A living room that is invitingly arranged and well aired
- A cordial and hospitable host
- A hostess of charm, a requirement that means everything - poise, sympathy, tact, and perfect manners - at all times
For all dinners, these requisites are much the same, but the necessity for perfection increases in proportion to the formality and how important the occasion is. By definition, it isn't possible to give a formal dinner without the help of servants. No matter how elaborate the meal, if the guests have to help themselves from a buffet, or if the hostess has to rise to clear the dinner table, it immediately becomes an informal dinner.
Let us suppose that you have a butler, footmen, or kitchen maids for your formal dinner. If you don't have a footman they can be replaced by a maid, but at a truly formal dinner, those who serve the meal should be men. When the host doesn't have a chauffeur, a man must be hired to assist the ladies from the cars or taxis and direct and help with parking and bringing the cars to the door when the party is over. If there is a permanent cook in the house, they prepare the meal. The butler and footmen are only hired in the evening. They serve and assist the cook with the cleaning up. The hostess sets up the table, centerpiece, arrangement of the flowers and any other responsibilities that might be needed for the preparation for the guests. The butler, footman and doorman should come early enough to discuss all details of service with the hostess, the cook arrives earlier in the day so that the hostess doesn't need to concern herself with the preparation of the dinner.
If cocktails are to be served at the party they should be mixed and prepared by the butler before the guests arrive, so that the dinner is not delayed. The butler, footman, and waitress may not leave until the guests have been ushered out, the glass washed, and the last ash tray emptied. Some caterers send a bill for the services and prefer you don't add tip. Payment methods vary in different localities and depend on the policy of the agency through which they have been hired. In any case, the method and the amount of payment should be established at the time they are hired to avoid embarrassment or unpleasantness that may ruin an otherwise perfect evening.
Posted by Eugene Vodovoz at 14 October 2011, 10:19 AM 
Categories: Etiquette
Tags: formal dinner formality etiquette hostess butler chauffeur
Categories: Etiquette
Tags: formal dinner formality etiquette hostess butler chauffeur
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